Apologies

i am not trying to be mean to anyone with anything i say in this blog, i don't want to upset well-meaning people, of which there are many. i do have good friends (even those that let me down), but i needed to write the following post. this is my catharsis, my psychologist. so, i apologise in advance if i offend anyone. that is not my intention. i am just trying to work through and express very strong, negative emotions that i am experiencing at the moment. i am sure that by tomorrow i will have something more positive to say. i am documenting a journey and i would be a liar if i didn't include these evil times. i want to be truthful and the truth hurts; so BEWARE!