Ammendments

WOW! 2 consecutive posts! that hasn't happened in a long long time. must be something important! hmmm ... maybe, maybe not. i just felt like i had some stuff to write down in my 'diary'. first off: i have my ticket to taiwan! HIP HIP HOORAY! now that i have the ticket i am jumping outta my skin to get back there. i have been checking out available jobs and apartments and getting more and more excited. freedom! independence! travel! i can't wait! so much for my momentary doubts about whether or not i should be going. clearly my heart is already in taiwan.

my angiography date has also changed. i was booked for november 18, but my mom discovered that medical aid will not pay for it unless i have it after november. so now i must go in december. god, i am so sick of all these petty rules that medical aid has. you pay them every month and then you basically have to hold a gun to their head before they will actually help you. they just want your money. argh! it will be great to be back in the land of government assisted health care soon. after what has happened to me i am always conscious of all aspects of my physical and mental health and i pay a lot of attention to doctor's bills and medical aid. i believe ALL countries should have government assisted health care. it is essential!

and speaking of mental health. the other exciting thing is that i have decided to start weaning myself off the cipramil. i am sick of being wrapped in the cotton wool of an anti-depressant. i no longer need it as far as i'm concerned. i know how to make a weaning schedule and i know that i am the best judge of what my mind and body are capable of dealing with. after having dealt with the clonazepam withdrawals, i realise that no doctor can tell me how to do it, only my body can tell me. hopefully this won't take almost a year to come off though! i think i should be ok as long as i take it slowly. it's not as if i was given it because i REALLY needed it. anyway, i took 30mg today instead of 40mg and will do that for a week and see how it goes.

i'm feeling pretty good today - even though it is yucky and cloudy. i will be doing yoga tonight and then will be off to have dinner with a friend. i'm still bothered by not seeing B enough, but i know it is not his fault. i mean, i don't even know for sure if he is going to end up coming to taiwan, but if he does then we have plenty of time to get closer. this time i won't rush into anything - for a change!